Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Thursday Thirteen #7 - Analogy 101

Thirteen Hilarious Analogies for Writers and Other Word Geeks

  1. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
  2. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.
  3. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
  4. His thought tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.
  5. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.
  6. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 instead of 7:30.
  7. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.
  8. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.
  9. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant, and she was the East River.
  10. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 pm traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19pm at a speed of 35 mph.
  11. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
  12. The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at the fire hydrant.
  13. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife’s infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM machine.
BTW - I can't take credit for writing these,... thank goodness!

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amy said...

Very Creative list this week.Thanks for posting..You are great with words

Missy said...

ROFLMAO Awesome list!

Miranda said...

Great list!!


Happy Thursday Thirteen!!

she said...

I've seen this before, but it always makes me chuckle. Thanks for the early morning giggle.

Sunflower said...

Interesting list for the TT!

Thanks for stopping by my Sunflower blog!Welcome back any time.

I will Exercise for Comments!

Milan-zzz said...

Hilarious indeed!
#3 is my favourite!

Happy TT!
Mine is up too :)
Cheers from Serbia!

Chris said...

I can go for the glistening hair one right now!


Christine said...

ROFL!! Number 9 and 11 cracked me up. Great list. :)

Susan Helene Gottfried said...

I know I've seen some of those before -- the vegetable soup one always makes me gag -- but others... either they aren't as memorable or they're new.

Either way, I'm glad I didn't write them!

Anonymous said...

LOL!!! Loved those! Thanks for the morning laugh!

Joely Sue Burkhart said...

Oh, these are great! Happy TT!

Anonymous said...

ROFLMAO!!!! Those are absolutely hilarious. They remind me of the winners of the Bulwer-Lytton contest! :)

Happy TT to ya, Wylie!

Fence said...

lol, those are great.

Amy Ruttan said...

You so funny. I loved the first one! Great list!

Vicky said...

OMG they were all sooo funny! And I don't think I've ever heard any of them before - love it! Maybe you should join Amy in writing a comedy. ;) Great list!

Shiloh Walker said...

Man, some of those are just.... eewwwww....

Glad I wasn't drinking anything when I read this. I'd be cleaning my monitor instead of blog hopping


Alyssa Goodnight said...

I've read these before, but THANK YOU for posting them! Any chance to LOL is great, and I laughed all the way through these!

LOVE #4!

Happy T13!! Thanks for visiting.

Jaci Burton said...

*dying laughing*

Thank you for these. They made my day.

Angie said...

I read these once, long ago, but they always make me laugh. This is one of my favorites:

The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at the fire hydrant.

Skittles said...

Funny Funny stuff!!!!!

Raggedy said...

ROFL! Those were fantastic!
Terrific Thursday Thirteen!
My TT is posted.
Have a wonderful day!
Happy TT'ing!
(")_ (")Š

Colleen Gleason said...

Ewww. A garbage bag filled with vegetable soup? Ugh.

Thanks for coming by my blog!

Heather said...

ROFL! Had to read these aloud to hubby.

jdoriot said...

6, 7, 10 and 12...made me cackle! What a fu list!! I've enjoyed my visit and will be back!

Rashenbo said...

Heheh! I've seen some of these on a metaphor list collected by teachers. They are great. I love the jeopardy one and the ballerina one!

Thanks for visiting my blog!

Jill said...

Very funny!! Almost sounds like something a kid would say!! You put a big smile on my face!!