Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Beware -- read at your own risk

Warning: Negativity Ahead...

USUALLY, if I don't have anything nice to say, I try not to say it...
but I just read the worst book in the history of publishing!!! (and you know I'm not prone to exaggeration :)
I found jump-out-and-slap-you-across-the-face spelling errors, misplaced modifiers that would make a third grader cringe and formatting issues. The central characters were unlikeable, one-dimensional and contradicted themselves several times. The premise was ridiculously unbelievable, the sub-characters were stereo-typed caricatures, and don't even get me started on the groaningly bad sex scenes -- I skimmed the first few then was driven to skipping them completely!!
So why, you must be asking, did you bother finishing?
I had to! I was compelled to, if only to see if it could indeed get any worse. And you know what? IT DID! The ending was funny in a ha-ha way, it was funny in an 'I don't fucking believe it' way. (And I don't swear often...)

I know so many really good writers who are having a hell of a struggle getting published, then I read this crap and bang my head into the wall. How could any self-respecting publisher/editor accept this garbage, add it to their catalogue and faust it onto an unsuspecting reader?

Here's the thing -- I'm not going to name the book or author because I feel really bad for this person (whose own mother must be the head of the publishing company). But I am adding it to my 50 book challenge because I should get a freaking medal just for turning every pathetically written page.

And now I must find a really good book to help exorcise the 60,000 crappy words floating around in my brain.

11 comments:

Amy Ruttan said...

Whoa, it must have been. You usually try to see the good in everything.

Doesn't it make you wonder sometimes when you come across crap that it's not what you know, but who you know.

Megan Frampton said...

Those kinds of books give me hope when it comes to getting published again (which sounds really, REALLY pathetic, but it is the truth).

So I'm kinda psyched to see them on the shelves.

What genre was it? I mean, beyond romance?

Robyn Mills said...

It makes you wonder why you sweat over words and comma placement and what editors are looking for, doesn't it? I have a friend who is a compulsive corrector... she reads with a pencil in her hand and writes all over the book.

Wylie Kinson said...

Yes, gals... it truly was a poor speciman of literature.

Megan - I think it was trying to be a contemporary romantic comedy. Sadly, it produced more cringes than smiles.

Robyn - it was the first book I've ever read that made me want to take a red pen and correct it as I went!!

Anonymous said...

Argh, it sounds awful! Here's some mental floss ;) -- that's what I use if I read a particularly bad book or see a really bad movie.

Vicky said...

Makes me wonder if you're talking about the same book I read. There can't possibly be that many TERRIBLE books in the world can there?

A couple of years ago I picked up a book at the store that was a romantic comedy and by an author I have not read yet - I picked up two of her books. Bantam Books - they can't disapoint me, can they? They sure as hell can! But on the bright side, after reading the first book and getting half way through the second before calling it quits... I decided that I could write better shit than that! So that's what got me started. :)

Here's the kicker... I went to see what review it got from Romantic Times Book Review and it got a 4! A friggin' 4!!! I almost fell on my ass! I don't know who I was more disapointed in, Bantam for publishing such garbage or for someone from RTBR giving it a 4! :) I feel your pain... and love #16 on your 50 booklist! :)

Unknown said...

I'm almost scared to ask, is it print or e-pub? Please don't let it be an e-pub...

Joely Sue Burkhart said...

Oh, no! I read--well, started--a really bad book this week too. It's paranormal, though, so we're talking about different ones.

Anonymous said...

Euwwww...

I have to admit, I'd stop reading much sooner. I have little patience for poorly written or poorly edited books. There are enough books out there that I really can't see slogging through a bad one.

Sparky Duck said...

you know its bad when the sex scenes are unreadable. No hints on the author though or anything?

Candy Minx said...

yikes...what's worse for me though is a "high brow" literary novel that I think sucks.

Is this a famous author, can you tell us that?