Friday Four (in lieu of Thursday Thirteen)

I was just too busy to sit down and do a Thursday Thirteen yesterday, so I give you instead my Friday Four.

FOUR Things You Should NEVER Say to Your Mother

On learning about the birds and the bees -
"Actually Mom, it works better like this..." or
"Hey... that's not how my boyfriend showed me!"

Upon moving out of the family home for the first time -
"Don't worry about me, Mom. As long as I have a back and legs, I'll never starve."

In answer to the question, "When are you going to settle down and get married?" -
"As soon as Butch gets out of jail."

If you've got one to share, put it in comments and I'll post it here!

Sparky Duck's version "well as long as I have kneepads I will never starve"