In case you were wondering - hey, "where'd she go?" -- I just gotta say, after I wrote the last post on my adoption dilemma, I needed some emotional distance. I really had no idea how deep this issue would affect me.
(Or maybe the Christmas Season is too sentimental a time for me? LOL)
I guess because I have such a great family and wonderful life, I've always sort of taken my adoption in stride, never dwelled, never wallowed in the "omg - I was rejected as a baby" crap, but WOW -- I'm a bit of a mess over this.
That said, I really appreciate all who commented. Your wisdom and caring, your hugs and advice, your stories (thanks Julia-the other perspective was eye-opening) made me think, consider, and search deep for how much of this I want/can invest of myself. You all made such good points and if/when I decide to take a next step, I'll keep you posted :)
Merry Christmas to all my friends in the blogosphere, and a happy, healthy, prosperous and productive 2010.
MWAH!
~Wylie
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Mystery of Adoption, the Dilemma of Birth Parent Searches, and all that jazz :o
Christmas... a time for family and friends, a time to be thankful and generous, a time to reflect on the year past and hope for the year ahead.
Maybe that's why I'm obsessing about the current drama in my life...
Here's a brief overview:
I was adopted as a baby. I've always known this, in fact, my Mom used to tell me stories about how she picked me out specially from a room full of babies because I was special and shiny (well, maybe not shiny...) and it made me feel CHOSEN. I loved it. And I have a great mom and an amazing sister and grew up very happy.
But. But, but, but... the curiosity. It was there. Always. So when I was in my twenties I managed to get some information about my birth mother. It was non-identifying, so no names or places were mentioned, just general medical stuff, what my birth-mom and birth-dad were interested in, and the circumstances of my birth.
I tried, thru the Children's Aid Society of Canada - who holds all the ultra-secret documents, to make contact with my birth-mom but sadly she didn't feel the same. Apparently her family was never aware of my existence and she wanted to keep it that way.
Fine, I respect that.
Earlier this year, the province of Ontario opened up the adoption records so I applied for and received my original birth certificate, hoping that my birth father would be listed. Alas, birth-mom didn't include his name on the form. But I know my name, and her name, and where she used to live.
Small coincidence - my initials are W.K. yes? My birth-name initials are K.W. *shivers*
This is where it gets twilight-zone weird...
I was born and raised in a place called Thunder Bay, which is a long way away - 1600 kilometers - from the Toronto area, where I currently reside. My birth-mom was in university in Thunder Bay so I always assumed that she was from some small town in Northern Ontario.
Nope.
Her listed address from 40ish years ago is town that happens to be just down the road from where I live now. HOW BIZARRE IS THAT?!
If you're guessing that I went there - to that old address - just to see where my birth mom grew up, you're correct.
I recruited a friend, stuffed my pockets with tissues (in case of hysterical breakdown) and off I went. Sat in front of the house for many minutes, wondering... Do my grandparents still live there? The grandparents that don't know I exist? The grandparents who don't know that they've got two gorgeous great-grandsons??
Yes.
They still live there.
I know this because damned if they didn't have their name on a plaque next to the garage.
What next? I keep reminding myself that this isn't a made-for-television movie, that I can't go knocking on the door and tearfully spill my story and have these elderly people embrace me. Not sure I'd even want that. But, but, but, but... the curiosity. It's there.
What should I do, people of the blogworld? WHAT SHOULD I DO???
*
Maybe that's why I'm obsessing about the current drama in my life...
Here's a brief overview:
I was adopted as a baby. I've always known this, in fact, my Mom used to tell me stories about how she picked me out specially from a room full of babies because I was special and shiny (well, maybe not shiny...) and it made me feel CHOSEN. I loved it. And I have a great mom and an amazing sister and grew up very happy.
But. But, but, but... the curiosity. It was there. Always. So when I was in my twenties I managed to get some information about my birth mother. It was non-identifying, so no names or places were mentioned, just general medical stuff, what my birth-mom and birth-dad were interested in, and the circumstances of my birth.
I tried, thru the Children's Aid Society of Canada - who holds all the ultra-secret documents, to make contact with my birth-mom but sadly she didn't feel the same. Apparently her family was never aware of my existence and she wanted to keep it that way.
Fine, I respect that.
Earlier this year, the province of Ontario opened up the adoption records so I applied for and received my original birth certificate, hoping that my birth father would be listed. Alas, birth-mom didn't include his name on the form. But I know my name, and her name, and where she used to live.
Small coincidence - my initials are W.K. yes? My birth-name initials are K.W. *shivers*
This is where it gets twilight-zone weird...
I was born and raised in a place called Thunder Bay, which is a long way away - 1600 kilometers - from the Toronto area, where I currently reside. My birth-mom was in university in Thunder Bay so I always assumed that she was from some small town in Northern Ontario.
Nope.
Her listed address from 40ish years ago is town that happens to be just down the road from where I live now. HOW BIZARRE IS THAT?!
If you're guessing that I went there - to that old address - just to see where my birth mom grew up, you're correct.
I recruited a friend, stuffed my pockets with tissues (in case of hysterical breakdown) and off I went. Sat in front of the house for many minutes, wondering... Do my grandparents still live there? The grandparents that don't know I exist? The grandparents who don't know that they've got two gorgeous great-grandsons??
Yes.
They still live there.
I know this because damned if they didn't have their name on a plaque next to the garage.
What next? I keep reminding myself that this isn't a made-for-television movie, that I can't go knocking on the door and tearfully spill my story and have these elderly people embrace me. Not sure I'd even want that. But, but, but, but... the curiosity. It's there.
What should I do, people of the blogworld? WHAT SHOULD I DO???
*
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Holiday baking
The writing has been put aside until the new year as I prepare for the madness of the holidays. And I do mean MADNESS...
This weekend I have a Christmas dinner on the town with the mom-friends, the Toronto Romance Writers Christmas party and my oldest son's birthday (and party!) -- soooooo, when it comes to my baking, I stick to the four letter rule: E. A. S. Y.
Here are two quick recipes that will ensure an empty plate:
In a large mixing bowl, cream until light and fluffy:
1 cup butter
1 cup brown sugar
1 egg yolk
1 tsp vanilla
Then add:
2 cups flour
1/4 tsp salt
Mix well. Press into a square pan and bake at 350 for 20-25 minutes or until golden brown. Break four 7 oz chocolate bars into squares (chocolate chips work too!) and place on top of the hot layer. Let stand until the chocolate is melted, then spread. Sprinkle with 1/2 cup of chopped nuts. Cut into squares while warm.
I think I posted this next one on my blog two or three years ago, but it's totally worth repeating. My friend Sue gave me this next recipe and I've managed to convince myself that's it healthy because it contains oatmeal. Yeah... I'm delusional that way ;)
Bring to boil:
1/2 cup milk
1/2 cup Crisco
2 cups white sugar
Boil just until bubbles have formed. Too much boiling will affect how the cookies set.
Stir in:
3 cups rolled oats
1 cup shredded coconut (I use unsweetened)
6 tbsps cocoa
1 tsp vanilla
Mix together well and drop by the spoonful onto waxed or parchment paper and leave to set. Use a tbsp to get big yummy cookies or a teaspoon for lots of bite-sized goodness.
* * *
Have I whet your appetite? :)
I'm off to make shortbreads (Grandma's secret recipe)
This weekend I have a Christmas dinner on the town with the mom-friends, the Toronto Romance Writers Christmas party and my oldest son's birthday (and party!) -- soooooo, when it comes to my baking, I stick to the four letter rule: E. A. S. Y.
Here are two quick recipes that will ensure an empty plate:
Toffee Squares
In a large mixing bowl, cream until light and fluffy:
1 cup butter
1 cup brown sugar
1 egg yolk
1 tsp vanilla
Then add:
2 cups flour
1/4 tsp salt
Mix well. Press into a square pan and bake at 350 for 20-25 minutes or until golden brown. Break four 7 oz chocolate bars into squares (chocolate chips work too!) and place on top of the hot layer. Let stand until the chocolate is melted, then spread. Sprinkle with 1/2 cup of chopped nuts. Cut into squares while warm.
I think I posted this next one on my blog two or three years ago, but it's totally worth repeating. My friend Sue gave me this next recipe and I've managed to convince myself that's it healthy because it contains oatmeal. Yeah... I'm delusional that way ;)
Chocolate Coconut Macaroons
Bring to boil:
1/2 cup milk
1/2 cup Crisco
2 cups white sugar
Boil just until bubbles have formed. Too much boiling will affect how the cookies set.
Stir in:
3 cups rolled oats
1 cup shredded coconut (I use unsweetened)
6 tbsps cocoa
1 tsp vanilla
Mix together well and drop by the spoonful onto waxed or parchment paper and leave to set. Use a tbsp to get big yummy cookies or a teaspoon for lots of bite-sized goodness.
* * *
Have I whet your appetite? :)
I'm off to make shortbreads (Grandma's secret recipe)
Saturday, December 05, 2009
Wylie is writing...
Quick and Dirty writing update... cause the pizza man should be knocking any second:
1. Jump Zone -- I only sent about 10 queries, but 10 was enough! WAH... Oh market, why won't you give my post-apocalyptic adventure a chance? I'll resume shopping this puppy after Christmas. OR... maybe I'll edit some more. It's running long at 100K and could probably be tighter.
2. Finished polishing Clara's story - which now has a title - A Taste for the Game. Sent queries out.
3. Beginning Lydia's story (Clara's friend in ATftG...) so that if by some miracle ATftG is sold, I'll have a follow-up started.
4. Also must finish the short I began AGES ago for Ellora's Cave. Kept putting it aside and now it's haunting me.
1. Jump Zone -- I only sent about 10 queries, but 10 was enough! WAH... Oh market, why won't you give my post-apocalyptic adventure a chance? I'll resume shopping this puppy after Christmas. OR... maybe I'll edit some more. It's running long at 100K and could probably be tighter.
2. Finished polishing Clara's story - which now has a title - A Taste for the Game. Sent queries out.
3. Beginning Lydia's story (Clara's friend in ATftG...) so that if by some miracle ATftG is sold, I'll have a follow-up started.
4. Also must finish the short I began AGES ago for Ellora's Cave. Kept putting it aside and now it's haunting me.
Tuesday, December 01, 2009
Satin Sash by Red Garnier
* ~ * ~ * It's SATIN SASH release day* ~ * ~ *
He loved her.
She loved him.
And then there was another who loved them both . . .
The Satin Sash.
She loved him.
And then there was another who loved them both . . .
The Satin Sash.
* * Get out the party favors, Red's first "I've made the big-time" book is out today!! * *
Satin Sash, from NAL Heat is in bookstores TO-DAY so run (don't walk... run) out and get your copy. Here's the blurb:
Business partners Grey Richards and Heath Solis are best friends, even
though they’re as different as night and day. Grey is calm, confident, and
always in control. Heath is as passionate as his smoldering looks. No woman can
resist them, and it’s always been easy to share. Until now…
Grey is head over
heels in love with Antonia Kearny, a woman whose luscious body enflames his
senses and whose playful, willing spirit captures his heart. He’ll do anything
to see her smile, to hear her breath catch, to make her scream his name. And
when he realizes that Toni wants another man—and that it’s Heath—he’ll make the
ultimate sacrifice…
On a decadent weekend in Mexico, Toni will experience the
hunger, the touch, the taste of two men. But will her desire bring them
together, or tear the three apart?
Got to tell you kids... this book will keep you riveted to your favorite reading chair so take my advice and set the ceiling fan on high before you get comfy or you may spontaneously combust.
If you can't get to your nearest bookstore, here are some online links:
From Red's website: http://www.redgarnier.com/books/sash.php#excerpt
Buy from Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0451228030/redgar-20
Borders: http://www.borders.com/online/store/TitleDetail?sku=0451228030
Barnes and Noble: http://search.barnesandnoble.com/Satin-Sash/Red-Garnier/e/9780451228031/
One million congratulations to you, Red. Many happy sales (that's a given) and many many more books please :)
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